It’s been quite some time since we’ve had Jono Diener of The Swellers featured with a new Contributor Blog, and we couldn’t be more thrilled to have him back. In his new blog, Jono tackles the subject of reviews and reviewers and it makes for a great read. The Swellers also just released a fantastic album called Good For Me that everyone should check out and purchase here if you’re into it. Make sure to read the full blog and enjoy!

A Review On Reviews And Reviewers

This is a pretty relevant time for me to write a piece on this subject. My band’s new album, Good For Me, just came out on Fueled By Ramen Records. It’s a joyous occasion celebrating 2 years of hard work and getting to work with producer/punk legend Bill Stevenson of Black Flag/Descendents fame. This is our fourth release on a label and we’ve had a wide variety of reviews over the last 9 years of our existence as The Swellers. The funny part about ALL OF THIS is that we actually received all awesome reviews on this new album. So you’re probably wondering, “Why the hell is he writing this? Wait, more importantly, why am I reading this?!” Well, Metaphorical Person, those are very valid questions! The reason I’m writing this to you is very simple. Your opinion should not be based on one person’s thoughts. You should always try to experience things for yourself first. This is what I like to call, “forming your own opinion.” I know not many people are into the idea, but trust me, it’s well worth it. 

If you’re in a band, you know the drill. You bust your ass working on a record, you send the record to magazines/websites to check it out, you promote the hell out of it, and RIGHT before it’s coming out you start getting reviews. That’s right, you get the email in your inbox or the call from a band member/manager and in the back of your head you’re crossing your fingers for some rad score or high number of stars. So you dig into the first review! First you’ll read the introduction talking a bit about your past and how that compares to your current musical endeavor. Next you’ll notice what they thought of each song whether it goes in order, or it groups them stylistically or mentions the message behind each song. They’ll awkwardly describe each member of the band’s role in the songs, even if it’s not a stand out part (“Steve totally played EVERY NOTE on the bass in that song!”). It’s oddly formulaic, but that’s what you’re supposed to do, right? Then you finally get to the score. Whether it’s out of 5 stars, the number 10 or a percentage, it’s going to put its mark on your record potentially forever. This is where your reaction varies between: “Boys, we really did it this time!” and “Are you serious? That is complete bullshit!” 

Now, let’s look at the reviewers. These people whose opinions are apparently made out of solid gold. These opinions are sold and traded and idolized then mummified forever in print, whether its good or bad. Well, the truth is, they’re just normal people. A reviewer ranges from a college student who worked on a music news website taking his first stab at a publication, a high school student lucky enough to work at a site, or a veteran reviewer working at a big magazine. You know what these people all have in common? They can literally say whatever they want, and potentially you will be eating it up. 

Let’s say Billy has his midterms starting tomorrow and he’s stressing out. The site he works for called CoolPunkMusic.com sends him an email reminding him he has to finish his three reviews… TONIGHT! Oh man, Billy is flipping out. He opens the burned promo CDs the label sent him, he loads it on his computer while writing his paper and his fingers start typing. That’s right, Billy finished 3 reviews in 30 minutes. Luckily he had the luxury and help of the previous reviews these bands got already. It’s like Cliff Notes! Each band gets about 10 minutes of a listen, the review is the same structure about Steve the bassist, the same songs were the best or the worst, and all the content seems perfectly in place. He turns it in, continues studying then the next week he’s in school cranking out those tests. The funny part is he doesn’t realize how much he’s potentially changed these people’s lives. The 2.5/5 stars he gave The Skunk Ducklings because their CD was too long totally bummed them out. The tour they tried to submit for passed due to the low rating. Kids on the site began making fun of them because they knew it wasn’t worth checking out which made even MORE people avoid them. But despite their terrible (fake) name, they actually wrote a killer album. Billy screwed The Skunk Ducklings because he was in a rush and everyone took the review to heart. Did it effect his life? Not at all. He continued getting free music from labels to review, drinking Surge Cola and mowing down on Slim Jims each night while playing video games. 

If you see a movie that gets a 30% rating you probably skip it and wait for it to come out on DVD. Then you watch it and realize it was actually right up your alley, you even LOVE it. The confusion should be washed away when you realize this is one person’s opinion who likes completely different things than you. It’s the same with music. There are these musical pieces of treasure floating around this vast ocean of sound that you may never grab out of the water because you’re too afraid of what you read. You fear a waste of time. You fear disappointment. Well, if you didn’t EVER try new or different things your life would be fairly boring. These people can deter you or draw you in at the snap of a finger. They probably don’t realize how much power they really have, but it’s a lot. 

So with all of that said, I hope you go into things with a grain of salt. Please try to form your own opinion before instantly taking what you read as gospel. Explore a little. Don’t think of an album as a number or a witty tag-line, think of it as a group’s self-expression and blood/sweat/tears put into an mp3, or CD, or vinyl record waiting for you to relate to it. With this technologically advanced world you can type in a song name on google or video on YouTube and make the judgement yourself. That’s right, it’s potentially quicker than reading a whole review (and a hell of a lot quicker than reading this rant). The reviews may put their mark on an album, but it’s the music that can put its mark on the world and it’s out there waiting for you to hear it.